HOw do you FEEL (part 2.......)

Assalamualaikum & good morning...

Geedikkk tak title kat atas tu??? Siap ber part part bagai hahahahaha....haaa entry pg ni mmg kesinabungan entry sblm ni.....ermm in my first entry ade mention yg blog ni mmg utk ai luahkan ape yg terpendam ....biase la Ttcians mmg sensetipppp....hikhikhik...so here we go!! (Tak bape stuju dgn ape yg ai bakal tulis...feel free to press X button)

Mcm ni tau, when u know u probably pregnant.....HOW DO YOU FEEL? ...mine?  Im happy + excited + worry + confuse .... itu lah perasaan sayaaaaa bile tgk UPT tuuu....even line 1 lg samar2 but still harap pregnant uolss.... (i wont lie....mmg ai sgt berharap.... :(  sob...sob)

Then ai share pic tu with my sis...and as i told in previous entry she said mmg 2 line disitu....(hati makkkk lompat2 uols time tu huuhu ....tp hati jek not fizikal hahahaha) so bermulaaa lah episod nasihat menasihati.....dont do that..dont do this....can eat that not this....bla...blaa...blaa...dlm hti berkate2 gak haishhh blom kompom kot....butt one thing aku sgt sgt suke n happy dgn kate2 positve dia....ai ckp gak "wehh what if xde....sbb line sgt samar kann" and she replied me...dont say that...insyaallah ade tu..doa semoga Allah kurniakan janin @kandungan yg sihat..permudahkan sgalanya....byk lg kate2 yg sangat menyenangkan hati n halwa telinga ai dgr....hehehe.....i love u sis!!!! Sooo much!!! HOW DO U FEEL?...mine? ....im happy.... :)

Owh yaaa...i told my sis not to tell my mom until its confirm....however she was so excited, n dia pun bg tau (dlm hatiii haiiilaaa haiiii kang kok x jd sian ibu...sbb even this is not cucu pertama uols tp im the youngest and among siblings ai jek blom ade jekiii..)....dan bermula lah lg episod petua and much more advse from her...and she also gv me alot of kata2 yg sgt2 positve...me love u toooo ibuuu ....HOW DO YOU FEEL? mine....im super dupper happy uols :)

Besides excted yg overloaded, other reason yg buat my sis btau ibu sbb kate nye "takpela ibu tau..doa ibu kan paling mustajab.....besides ko doa sendiri im sure ibu akan doaaa more2 extra tuk ko dik" haishhh sedih lak bile dia ckp cmtu....dlm hti hurmmm betul gak.....

Cik hun dia mula2 xcted kot...tp kontrol2 skit huhu and besides ibu n sis...he is pillar of my strenght
He was sooo cool, calm and steady. Katenye bersedia dgn segala kemungkinan.....love u hunnn!!! 

Happy kan bile kite cite kaat the one we loved most....and their feedbck like haaiihhh sooo menenangkan hti .....tp nk buat mcm mane happy tu x lame bile upt -ve.... but org2 yg kat ats ni keep bg moral support...their always positve..kate2 mcm

# its ok dik...insyaalllah ade rezeki tu
# Allah nak uji dulu....insyaallah ade sok tu
# takper .....jgn putus doa mtk kat Allah, dia maha mengetahui
#takpelah....xde rezeki nak buat mcm mane, kite kan ade anak buluss...kite jg dia je laa semtara nak ade baby (ni dr my hun...hehehe).
# takpe2...tp kan hati aku ni kuat ckp ko akan pregnant this yr (haaa ni dr my bff....dia pon sgt positve..love u bff)
#keep on trying babe.....
# Allah da aturkan segalanya tuk ko....ade hikmah tuuu....

Yeeer inilah kate2 yg aku nk dgr....Dan byk2 lg kate2 yg dorang bg supya aku x hilang semangattt hehe...HOW DO YOU FEEL? Surrounding by this beautiful fmily n frens....im blessed!!!

Buttttt.....bile ade positive makanya adela negatve kannn..bile da kompom xde, hati tergerak nak cite kat someone yg aku syg gak...but i just cnt share why i did not tell her bile upt +ve (ala2 perangkap samar tu) let me keep inside my heart....when i slowly btau dia, bla..bla..bla...she jst listen dgn kepla angguk2 sikit (bgtau time tu tgh makan , x senonoh kan hehehe...) ai pun gegehh cite from a to z...sambil sedih2 skit, soreee ai kendur2 sikit.....emosi skit....and lastly ai ckp hurmmm so skrg da xde, bile buat upt -ve.....and u know what she reply me?  "Owhhh yeke..hurm mmg xde tuuuuu" pstu smbng makan .....thats it!!!! Oiiiii mak geegeh cte, tu je???? Tu jeee??? .....ai pun trs tunduk sambung makan..walau rase nasikk tu mcm pasir..walau rase mcm air tu bile minum x rase itu air.....shre with someone that i love....but the feedbck was soooo.........xde kate2 semngat...simpati..kate2 nk pujuk hati yg duka lara nii...XDE OKEH!!!

so HOW DO YOU FEEL?  

Mine??? I was down.....down sampai bawah kerak bumi :(  tp aku cube gak tahan....bertahan....tp da x tertahan aku luah kan kat sini...sob...sob...sob..peristiwa masih jelas kat kepla otak aku ni haaa...masihhh berbekam...tp aku buat biasa je....dlm hati...jika ada rezeki aku mengandung aku x kan btau dia smpai lah dia tnye npe perut aku tekedepan sgt....until that moment just "ssshhhhhhh"

I believe most of ttcians go through same experince as mine...hanya kita yg rase yg tahu mcm mane perasaan itu.....pedih nye....sakit nye....keciwaaaa nye.....kdg2 hapy (bile upt +ve.... even x pregnant pon) perasaan mengharap tu dlm pada dmulut ckp x mengharap....tp di hatiii harapan setinggi2nya nk jd seorg ibu......bg yg kawin2 je trs pregnant, sile jgn bersuara mcm "aku faham perasaan ko" a big FAT noo plss...sbbb korang x kan faham...takkan faham stu ape pun sbb korang x rase ape yg kami2 ni rase....

Kepada di luar sane, tlg jgn tanye ape pun kat kami ttcians.....bile nk ade baby or anythng yg related....makkk x suke....x sukè okeh!! takpayh tanye just doakan kami je...doakan kami diam2 sudaa...

Okeh entry ni panjang bejelaaa...part 2 abis disini...hehehehe

Semoga doa2 ku dimakbulkan..amin

p/s: dear my precious bunga, ibu ingat haritu dpt jmpe bunga....tp takdir kite x tertulis begitu :(  tp doa ibu hari2 supaya dpt jmpe bunga...bunga yg ibu & daddy tunggu2....♡ u bunga!!!

XOXO
{ibubunga}

HOw do you FEEL??

Assalamualaikum,

Terasa nak luah somthing.....tak tau nak cite ke tak tp fikir punya fikir argghhh just write it here better..cite kat org bukan dorang paham kannn.  Mcm ni last month ade satu masa im not feeling weĺl..batuk +flu+damammmm. Stress gile oìiì!! Slalu aiii kalau demam flu bagai less thn a wèek recover dah...ni da 2 weeks still lg demam on n off, flu berterusan n batuk ok skit....

Nak dijdkan cite one of my colleague ckp "eh...ntah2 ko ni ngandung kottttt" which is x terlintas langsung kat otak aku ni haaa....sbb cik p aku mmg tingtong...kjp ade kjp xde....suke2 dia mai...si kwn itu suh aku buat upt...haaaaaaa seriau tauuu sbb ape? Sbb dlm entry aku yg mule2 kan ai btau yg aku seorg ttcians.....so kok cte bab BABY ni mmg aku suke berhaarap...(even tau kdg2 harap tu x bgs tuk kesihatan...sob....sob..sob)

Tp hati kate "mcm xde....." ai pon dok gegehhh la gune cik puan google....tanda2 awl2 kan...kan.kann....suprisingly sume tanda2 ade tanpe ai sedari huhuhu...tkpelah i dok gegeh kali ni g bli upt....beselah org ckp buat upt early in the morng baru accurae result nye....tp knowing me my self sifat saboooo tu kuranggg hahahahah jd nye aku buat ptg tu gak....n the result mcm ni 😕

Dannnn ini lg......

Sooooo.....what do you thnk???ade or xde... 😣

Kalau korang perasan mmg ade 1 line lg yg agak samar.....blurrrrr...... (tp kok x nmpk sowey lah hehehe) sbb bile tunjuk kat cik hun dia trs kate nampak (mayybe kenmpakan garisan itu d pengaruhi oleh keinginan dia nak baby ke or mmg dia nmpak betul) ....but i do send tis pic to my sis...n she said yess tooo..... ade 2 line , 1 with samar2.....

Hurm, mcm title aku kat atas "how do u feel lalau korang kat tmpat aku".....happy kah? Takut kah? ....as for me aku sgt berhati2 dgn perasaan aku..takut terlukaaaa lagi hukhukhuk..

I did it on 23mar..and repeating on 25th...same je resultnye.... butttt when i redo on 26th....there is not line at alll....only 1 line je.... huwaaaaa😭😭😭😭...againn how do u feel??? Btau cik hun dia ckp xpe saba...xde rezeki lg.. (mak pasrah tp masih berharap acane tuùuu) yelaaa 5 taun aku tggu oiiiì.....hukhuk....

Begitu laaaa cerite nye.....hati terluka lagiii dan lagi....pencarian cik bungahatisaya gagalll...

Ya Allah, kau tabahkanla hati ku....mak nangis x belaguù da niii hukhuk.....

p/s: my precious bungahati.....belom ade keizinan dr NYA untuk kita bertemu....semoga kita berjumpa suatu hari nanti.....amin

XOXO

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Damn tired😥

Assalamualikum....

Saya sgt penat. Today my colleague on medical leave. Pity her since yesterday not feeling well. Dia bukan seorang yg suke cotiiii....x suke mc....n x suke buat..not like me😆 but today mmg she need to rest (get well soon buddy!)

But lucky ade peneman..kurang la skit kerja...owh yaaa im working as a customer service...fening mak melayan dorang ni, but what to da kje kan...andd i do 💖 my job! 😊

After abis kje, trs ke class jait...haaaa uols jgn main2 tau....mak ade impian nak jd fashion designer..Nak jait baju sendiri (tp designer sendu lah) hahahah.....gegehhh arini blaja nak buat baju kebaya uolsss hewwwhewww😉.... tak sukeeee tp cube gak nk buat yg terbaik....insyaalllah....da bape arini haishh penat ...penat..normal routine tp penat mengalahkan org kje angkat simen...(mayb age factor kotttt ahaksss)......nak buat ape sume mls...padahal ade org tempah jait manik...tak gak siap2 lg...adoiii nyesal lak amik tempahan....jika ku tahu kemlsn sebegini melandaaaa makanye akan ku tolak tempahan ini...

Owh ya td en.hun anta ni...katenye cube la amalkan...mane tau kalau ade rezeki....haaa dpt je trs mak apply dlm doa lps solat td...positve.....positive....positive 

Allah maha pendengar doa....ttcians..jom amalkan....(mayb some of u da tau..)

Ok...bile bju da siap ai post lam ni...hehehe till then, c u in nxt entry

P/s: my precious bunga,smoga ade rezeki tuk kite jmpe😙😍


XOXO
{Ibubunga}

Introducing my self... :)

Assalamualaikum,

Let me introduce my self and why i created this blog... :) 

Nothing else, just want to express my feeling towards everything especially when comes to BABY issue (sob..sob...sob)..yaaa and my personal life, my family, my friends, my work....sometimes i do need someone to lend her shoulder on me, but i do not know who or most important thing is she undestand my situation? i have a bunch of friends..just name it..bff, my colleague, my schoolmate even my family ..sibling but nope... i dont trust them! why?? i dont have the answer...huhu owh yaa..i do lovee them very much..yesss veryyy much!!

Sometimes they dont even know that im suffering from their words...conversation...no..no..no...except ME.

Owh ya btw im ttcians...  :)  married for almost 5 years, a very very hard years for me without a baby (sob...sob...sob).  Treatment? erm...npe i did not get any...mcm urut or amik supplements tu ada laa....lain nope...maybe i will but laterrr.. (hehe mcm umo mude ye dokkk)....but yess not having a baby sangat menyakitkan...org tak faham..org tak tau..org hanya nampak im a happy go lucky person..but deep..deep inside ni haaa adoiiii....sedeyyy....but i do grateful sbb ada mr. hun, family, family in law, friends...all of them very the supportive....

Let me warn you, in next next entry ...will be emotional story moryyyy..hahahaha...suke baco tak suke just leave it!!! let me meroyan kat dlm ni....rase2 mcm nak fitammmm just tekan butang (X)....agagagagaga!

Owh ya nape blog ai name dia "Bunga Hati Saya"...sbb sayaaa berangan nak baby gurl!! and i nak named her as "Bunga" and she's gonna be my precious bunga in my heart... :)  harap2 berangan tu jd kenyataan kann dan pencarian bunga akan dipermudahkan oleh NYA amin...but if dapat baby boy pun ai akan bersyukur sgt....doakan aii ....

Kite sambung next entry........

XOXO,

{ibubunga}